Yes, we're a little crazy

To the average Joe/Jill patient, what we do at the Hotel seems kind of nuts. Rehab units are places where you can get up and get out, and you even have your own entourage, besides me, your unit tour guide.

Dear Mr. ABC:

Some people think I'm nuts when I tell them this, but it's absolutely true. I'm the tour guide and I usually get the job of helping you initially, getting settled in and used to the rhythm of the Hotel.

No, we're not like SuperLuxeRehab unit sown the street which gets remodeled, redecorated, repainted every time someone sneezes, no, welcome to the gritty world of the Hotel, which saw it's last wallpaper change in 1994. Now, the signs and some equipment you see are brand-spanking new, but  that's just because. We didn't want the signs (management says we have to be "just like everyone else"), but we did want the equipment, since it makes our jobs easier.

No you won't get a private room just because you have MRSA. This is not SuperLuxe. Join the MRSA club in a double room (almost 75% of our people have it, and some other bugs for which we isolate, too).

We are rehab nurses, so the three things we care about are bowel, bladder and skin. People will come in asking all kinds of questions on those three things, so don't be surprised. This is why I explained the reason you need a post-void bladder scan for a while.

We'll also bug you daily about your bowel habits, to make sure you're going. Yes, we really do care if you're going and want details, if you bother to look.(If you don't, we will.) Bowels that work tend not to cause problems, unless, of course, they work a little too much. Moderation is the key.

Skin, to me, is a no-brainer. As I tell patients, it's supposed to be clean, dry and intact. This is why we look at it regularly. If you need help cleaning it, that's what we're here to do. If you can do it, we are thrilled. One less bath I have to do, so I can do other stuff you need.

So, yes, Mr. ABC, we may seem crazy, but we care about you, and your bowels, bladder and skin.

Hope you enjoy and make good use of your stay at the Hotel.

Sincerely,

RehabRN