So not rehab

***Deviation ahead, please stand by...***

I'll never profess to being a hip, happening fashion or movie blogger. I'm just too "straight" as one of my patients told me recently.

However, I really enjoyed this article featuring Helen Mirren discussing fashion, insecurity, butt, and thighs.

I hope you enjoy being who you are as much as I do. Live like you want to live, baby!

More to come...

So many issues...

Two words: prosthetic butt.

Somethings really should be original....

That is all.

Please forgive me...

Jeff Foxworthy. I'm only doing this post, 'cause Auntie sent me a funny e-mail you did.

You might be coming to stay for a long time at Hotel Madison if....

...you broke your limbs falling out of your wheelchair when transferring unattended.

...a drug deal went bad and you broke your arm when it was shot...and you didn't like that hospital where the ambulance took you, 'cause they're not as nice as we are.

...your doc told you "Oh, it's just a two day annual checkup. We're not going to do anything about that hole in your butt." and then changed his/her mind when our specialist showed up and said you were a candidate for a new, experimental repair.

...you have that insurance that pays you to camp out with us. Why work?

...you just like us so much, you try your hardest to get sick to come and see us. Every time the doc's in the room, you hyperventilate.

NOTE: I have embellished on the scenarios here, but at least 75% of these excuses are used to get an extended stay at our Hotel.

I wish I were joking...more later.