Heard on the unit...

Here are a few of the gems I heard this weekend on our unit.

"I'm getting my own room in front to be closer to you." Mr. J.

Mr. J. said this to me when he got moved up to our private room when Ms. R. left this week.
What did he do to win the suite, you ask? Why he came up positive on his last UAC&S for acinetobacter in addition to the MRSA he already has in his wound. He was just saying that because my boss seems to assign me to the patients on the front end of the unit a lot more than the back.

"Ah. My Pepsi angel!" Mr. K.

I brought in a couple for him to keep him quiet but it didn't work. His behavior may or may not have been related to his suddenly missing Gabapentin order. He's got it back now and is more lucid than he's been in days.

"I hear the boss is alphabetizing everyone." Mr. J. (again)

Mr. J. got booted from his private suite when the other Mr. J. came up positive for acinetobacter, too. Besides that, two of our Mr. HIJ's (not their real names, but they are similar) got put in the same room, too, because the boss needed a three-bed room available for our new admissions next week. So much for avoiding similar names in the same room. It just makes for more excitement with the bed bingo that always seems to happen on our unit.