Heard on the unit...

In the offices, under the bed, outside, in the halls, you never know what people will say.

"What? Mr. X was 'ambulatory' at the scene of his slow motor vehicle accident? It's a miracle!" --Nurse Q.

Mr. X hasn't walked in years, partly because he doesn't have two legs. Q always is so observant when reading the notes the referral centers send to us.

"Mr. X was 'clean' according to the note. WTF? Did he have his accident in a car wash?"--Nurse Q

Yes, Q is a little too funny. Mr. X hasn't been clean in all the years I have known him, Q told me later. Said character is afraid he'll melt in water.If you can picture Pig Pen all grown up and missing a limb or two, you know what I mean.


"No wonder that pump didn't work. It did flip flops in his/her abdomen."--Nurse Madge

Nurse Madge is in charge of filling medication pumps at the Hotel. One patient's pump flipped so many times, it required surgical intervention to fix.

"It's better to ask forgiveness than to ask permission." --Doctor Barnum, our new boss.

Not when you piss off your referral nurse, it's not. Referral Nurse had to set boss straight, because they need to talk to get patients admitted to the Hotel. No customers is not good business, especially to the big bosses.

Stay tuned...the people I work with (and even the patients) say the darnedest things!