Heard on the unit...

Aw, it's been forever since I've had enough goodies for this segment! But when patients speak, sometimes we just bite our tongues and run as fast as we can to our lunch break, so we can share with the rest of the folks on the unit and with the audience at home.

Situation 1

RN is educating patient about the proper way to use an incentive spirometer. After demonstrating proper technique, patient says, "Oh, that's just like what I do at home with my bong." RN listens as patient describes how marijuana "relaxes my legs so I can get into my chair."

Sorry, remember that non-smoking thing you signed to come here for rehab? Yep, it applies to Mary Jane, too.

Situation 2

RN is talking to patient re: helping himself (He's a lower level thoracic paraplegic, so he can do it) by dressing and turning himself. "Oh, I'm not going to do that (turning) at home. I'll just wake her up." (implying whatever woman happens to be in his bed.)

Nice. My reply, "So since Babe #1 is not here, could you just move the pillows and turn yourself, please?"

Situation 3

From patient who is not really observant about following his intermittent catheterization rules or fluid restrictions.

"Where's my nurse? I missed my appointment." says Mr. Drinks-A-Lot.
"What appointment?" I asked.
"My catheter appointment. I've got a headache."
"Yes," I replied, "and you realize this is a sign of dysreflexia, correct?"
Patient shakes head.

If only Tom and Ray were here to do this...more to come...eventually!

Bad!

And I'm not talking Michael Jackson, folks!

The housework is done, I'm sitting at the computer relaxing and the fun just rolls in via e-mail.

First, no grant money is available for these researchers due to the economy.

Second, these nurses lost their jobs for doing their jobs.

And if those two didn't seem bad enough, and you have the time, read this Peter Singer article about Why we must ration health care (from www.nytimes.com)

Enough! I'm escaping...more later.

Sweet end to the week

I didn't have to get angry at anyone today. I keep reminding myself that frowning will cause wrinkles, and just being happy for the heck of it will irritate the people who drive you nuts.

My people were pretty good. One was up and one in bed, but the census has been low, so I can round on them, and do lots of other stuff without issue. I even helped out another nurse who was busy with his/her heavy (literally and figuratively) patient. Family education is a big part of what we do, so I had to verify that this family could do what they say they can do. Besides, I like the patient. He's a very nice guy. It's not hard to help him.

I actually had time to get into lots of interesting discussions today: about lazy coworkers (one of whom was chewed out by the boss for his/her lack of diligence), family education and dynamics between spouses when one has a debilitating disease or condition, previous lives and packing boxes.

One of my coworkers may trade me her schedule for part of next week, so we'll see if the boss lets me do it. I hardly think it will be an issue, but you never know. With our pre-JCAHO inspection, who knows what will happen.

I'll ponder it all this weekend...while I rest and relax. Stay tuned!