This article on cnn was interesting, because it talks about a variety of ailments that never existed when my parents and grandparents were growing up.
I can almost hear those sage characters laughing when I read about...
Tablet neck and BlackBerry thumb
Grandma L: (on tablet neck) Hunched over? Sit up straight! (on Blackberry thumb) It has a speakerphone? I need one of those. Who cares about typing? I never wanted to be a secretary anyway!
Grandma L. was a housewife who raised 7 kids and called everyone of them (including my mother) every morning. If she could have had a cell phone, she would have had one.
Earbud-induced hearing loss
Grandpa K: (great-grandpa --GG--actually): GET THOSE F**&^% out of your ears, you moron!
NOTE: GG was a foreman in a brewery back in the day. You had to yell for people to hear you on the production line. Another fun part of his job: wake up drunks who fell asleep. He was known for speaking his mind. Ahem...
Screen-related sleep disorder
Grandpa L: Turn off the lights. They're not free.
Grandpa worked nights, and he was not a big light fan. He was retired by the time I was born, and while I don't remember him much, he spoiled me (and my sister) rotten according to reports.
Stiletto strain
My mother: This is why you carry a big purse (so you can stash a pair of flats).
I have lots of photos of my mother in high heels in her youth.
Offbeat biorhythms
Grandma R: It's not good to eat after 6PM.
Grandma R was a tenacious survivor: married three times (first was a youthful romance gone bad, except for my dad) second was the love of her life (widowed) and third was a complete idiot (divorced after 3 years and infidelity on his part).
She worked as a real estate agent and died when I was a little girl. I read a few of her letters my father had, and I admire all she had to deal with in life. I'm sure my tenacity comes from her German-Anglo-Irish background.
Showing posts with label table. Show all posts
Showing posts with label table. Show all posts
Friday, November 29, 2013
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Boys will be boys
And idiots sometimes. You could tell the moon was full recently, since we had so much juvenile antics lately.
Scenario #1
Patient X doesn't like Patient Y. Patient X decides to duke it out with Patient Y in front of the table in the dining room. Security is called. Patient X gets a ticket, and will be considered for discharge soon. Patient Y fell down, so this causes tons of paperwork mayhem for Ella, our harried night charge nurse, who is late giving report, since she's filling out incident reports, info for security, fall reassessments, patient assessments, and calls to the on-call MD. Word spread fast around the unit, since one of our characters says to Mr. Y. when he saw him today, "I heard you had an exciting time earlier."
Scenario #2
Patient Z, one of our resident COPDers was scheduled for discharge recently. Patient Z likes it at our place, so he turns off his oxygen to make us think he's "sick". Try as he might to sabotage his discharge, we figured out that Z could indeed reach the oxygen valve from his perch in bed, and yes, he did turn it off. He got crazy, so the chiropractor came down at the boss's request and gave him a mini-adjustment, the specialist gave him his specialty consult, and finally, three hours late, his transportation showed up.
Scenario #3
Patient A tells our student nurse, who's doing an assessment for her master's program, that, yes, he is indeed still smoking weed. Despite everything, we have to keep him for a while. Patient A has developed a new problem and we cannot simply discharge him for non-compliance. So far, no one's found his stash.
So needless to say, I was happy, happy, happy to be going home after a long day. Stay tuned for more excitement. You never know what will happen at the Hotel Rehab.
Scenario #1
Patient X doesn't like Patient Y. Patient X decides to duke it out with Patient Y in front of the table in the dining room. Security is called. Patient X gets a ticket, and will be considered for discharge soon. Patient Y fell down, so this causes tons of paperwork mayhem for Ella, our harried night charge nurse, who is late giving report, since she's filling out incident reports, info for security, fall reassessments, patient assessments, and calls to the on-call MD. Word spread fast around the unit, since one of our characters says to Mr. Y. when he saw him today, "I heard you had an exciting time earlier."
Scenario #2
Patient Z, one of our resident COPDers was scheduled for discharge recently. Patient Z likes it at our place, so he turns off his oxygen to make us think he's "sick". Try as he might to sabotage his discharge, we figured out that Z could indeed reach the oxygen valve from his perch in bed, and yes, he did turn it off. He got crazy, so the chiropractor came down at the boss's request and gave him a mini-adjustment, the specialist gave him his specialty consult, and finally, three hours late, his transportation showed up.
Scenario #3
Patient A tells our student nurse, who's doing an assessment for her master's program, that, yes, he is indeed still smoking weed. Despite everything, we have to keep him for a while. Patient A has developed a new problem and we cannot simply discharge him for non-compliance. So far, no one's found his stash.
So needless to say, I was happy, happy, happy to be going home after a long day. Stay tuned for more excitement. You never know what will happen at the Hotel Rehab.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Slide on over, folks!
You'd think Tuesdays wouldn't be so bad...nurse brings in lots of pens from the conference, people are happy and we are slated for no admissions. I could dream about it, but it wasn't easy at all today. I told our specialist that I am one of the most highly paid janitors/support staff as I filled every single cart on the main hall with isolation gowns. Why? We have support staff, who don't really feel it's their job to do it. No, sitting in front of the boob tube (reserved for patients) and playing pool (also reserved for patients) is really a more productive effort. If my male boss only had some balls. Removing the pool table ones to his office might help the situation.
I had three patients today, and our clinic nurse actually got one ready, since she needed him for a procedure early. I was very grateful. The other two were their usual eccentric selves, and yes, for them it's all about bowels. One goes too much, one goes too little. One gets out of bed without issue and the other leaves a trail on the sliding board as he's transferring. What does the nurse win, Pat? Another heave ho back to the bed for the patient, with the nurse leading the charge.
Just remember all you nursing students out there, if a patient is stuck in transfer halfway on the bed, you can get them all the way there by employing a maneuver I like to call "the dump". Basically, you get their legs and heave them onto the bed. They may be on their side and a little off kilter, but once you get them to the safety of the bed, put up whatever rails you can on any side they could slide out on, and maneuver them around from the other. I love low air loss mattresses, especially if they're made up right, because, by nature, the sheets are slick and you can slide most people wherever you need them to go in bed with little effort.
Said sliding mess patient eventually did get cleaned up, got lunch and got to the wheelchair for afternoon therapy. It was a workout though, for him and for me. I read this article tonight very carefully, so I can keep my back out of trouble!
After all that excitement, I got to move another patient because his roommate was isolated for a new bug. Yes, I'm an expensive mover, too.
More later...stay tuned.
I had three patients today, and our clinic nurse actually got one ready, since she needed him for a procedure early. I was very grateful. The other two were their usual eccentric selves, and yes, for them it's all about bowels. One goes too much, one goes too little. One gets out of bed without issue and the other leaves a trail on the sliding board as he's transferring. What does the nurse win, Pat? Another heave ho back to the bed for the patient, with the nurse leading the charge.
Just remember all you nursing students out there, if a patient is stuck in transfer halfway on the bed, you can get them all the way there by employing a maneuver I like to call "the dump". Basically, you get their legs and heave them onto the bed. They may be on their side and a little off kilter, but once you get them to the safety of the bed, put up whatever rails you can on any side they could slide out on, and maneuver them around from the other. I love low air loss mattresses, especially if they're made up right, because, by nature, the sheets are slick and you can slide most people wherever you need them to go in bed with little effort.
Said sliding mess patient eventually did get cleaned up, got lunch and got to the wheelchair for afternoon therapy. It was a workout though, for him and for me. I read this article tonight very carefully, so I can keep my back out of trouble!
After all that excitement, I got to move another patient because his roommate was isolated for a new bug. Yes, I'm an expensive mover, too.
More later...stay tuned.
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