Not so sharp...

And I'm not talking about razors, either.

A recent admission: patient comes in for an evaluation by a specialist that he/she cannot get in his nearby hospital. Patient unpacks stuff and I notice three packs of smokes. Patient had a screaming fit when I advise him/her of our tobacco policy. Nevertheless, I had to do remove the smokes according to appropriate policies. Patient was counseled re: quitting. We offer appropriate support for those nicotine needs-- patches, gum, etc. Patient calms down and apologizes.

To assure his happiness, said patient also brings some snacks, and a few cans of soda. In addition to the soda, I notice the non-alcoholic beer. Another argument ensues (nicely of course), but I had to get one of our bosses to confiscate that. Patient just refused to part with the near beer without an authority present.

The ironic part: Admitting MD notes that patient would have come to us sooner had he/she not been busy cleaning up legal issues related to alcohol.